9/14/18 4am

I finally let go of the pain inside. I cried until I got a headache because it was all I could do. I cried for the loss of the man I have most loved in my life. I had to let him go because he didn’t love me back. I would have stayed if it weren’t for my incessant brain always searching for love. Damn our minds sometimes ruin things. The physical connection I had with this man surpassed any love I had ever encountered. It created a mental connection unlike any other. I would have done anything to retain him but his love hurt me so bad because it was always and only on his terms. His way of loving sometimes felt like rejection and my heart was breaking apart slowly. Yes I love him, I believe I always will. They say true love never goes away even when it isn’t reciprocated, it just becomes something else. I’m ok with that. I gave him up to chase love and now all I have is pain and despair.